Many years ago, I went to Myrtle Beach with three of my girlfriends. We ended up at an amusement park. I didn’t want to ride the roller coaster, but I also didn’t want them to know I was afraid, so, of course, I hopped on.
The first turn was made at the top, and as we leveled out, all I could see was the ocean ahead of me. The feeling of flying down the first hill was that of plunging into the ocean. I don’t remember much else other than a sick feeling. I was so relieved to get off of that roller coaster.
I’ve said before that if I only ever wrote my books to entertain my mother and my sister, it would have been worth it. Although I’ve hoped for more, that statement has always been true. I’ve been wondering why I’ve had so much unease lately. Last Saturday night, I had a light bulb moment. I realized the unease was coming from the emotional roller coaster I was still riding – and I wanted off!
Downloads, no downloads. Sales, no sales. Reviews, no reviews. Up and down and up and down and up and down. Whether I realized it or not, the ride was constantly running in the back of my mind.
I allowed the car to pull into the station, come to a complete stop … and I got off.
Last July, when I realized I had made total royalties of $74.72, Rich said to me, “Honey, $74.72 is more than you ever thought you’d make. You’re way ahead of the game.” He was right then, and he’s still right now.
I’ve accomplished more than I ever dreamed I would when I sat down to write my first story. I’m happy with the success I’ve achieved, and I’m not getting back on that roller coaster.
We will soon be out riding the motorcycle again, and I’m relieved I’ll be riding without nagging worries riding along with me. I already feel lighter, and I’ll be sure to report all of the crazy things Rich and I get into this summer while we’re out. In the meantime, I’m going to set my mind to working harder on Maple Leaf Hunter. I have a few fans waiting for it.